Making the Better Attitude Choice

One of the books I’ve written is called The Top Performer’s Guide to Attitude and in the book I focus on the fact that we can make choices in our attitude every single day.
Now one of my sons really demonstrates this. Years ago he was asked by a missionary to come and stay on the ranch out in the desert in Mexico just to help out with kids that needed help that were coming from bad situations, and they said, "Could you come out and stay with us for the summer?" And so my son went out there and the first day he called me and he goes, "Dad, dad, dad, I just killed a scorpion in my bed." So his mom is passed out behind me, but, you know, killing a scorpion is like, "Wow. Be careful, honey." And then the next day he calls me and he goes, "Dad, dad, dad, we just had to kill a rattlesnake." So now we’re just freaking out with all the dangers he’s had. And every day was something else, "Dad, there were fire ants," or, "Dad, there was this," "Dad, there was that," and all these different dangers around him. And then one of his last calls, he goes, "Dad, I went to the ocean and got stung by a jellyfish and it hurt a little bit but I went back in and got stung by a man o' war and it was horrific pain." And I’m like, "Well, what did you do? What did you do?" And I don’t know if you know what people need to do when they get stung, but basically his friends had to urinate on him. So I’m thinking, "How are you doing?" And this guy said, "Dad, you want to know how I’m doing? I’m having the time of my life. I’m having the time of my life." To him it was an adventure. Now there are other people that could have gone down and said, "Look, I’m giving my time, I’m giving my energy and look at all these bad things and all these dangers." My son has a great attitude, "I’m having the time of my life."
So I’d like to talk to you about three attitude choices that all of us can make every single day. Choice number one is gratitude versus entitlement. Entitlement is poison for the soul. "I deserve." "I deserve." I fly for a living and every now and then there’s a mistake and I get a middle seat and I get all worked up. I mean, how stupid is that? I’m worked up about a middle seat. There’s some people who can’t afford their meal for the day or are in physical danger every day. And I’ve just found for myself and for my clients that if every day we just focus on "What are my blessings? What am I grateful for in my life?" then it really changes how you operate.
Second choice is confidence versus arrogance. Confidence versus arrogance. Now, what is arrogance? I would say that arrogance is confidence without humility. Think about it, do people want to follow an arrogant person? Absolutely not. But we need confident people. And think about someone you know that’s highly confident, they know their stuff, and highly humble, they know they’re human. That combination is a powerful, powerful combination.
The third choice: forgiveness or bitterness. When we’ve been hurt in life and we hold that hurt in, it turns into poison and bitterness and depression and anger and all sorts of things that aren’t good for us. So every now and then I’m coaching someone on forgiveness and they say, "Well, they don’t deserve forgiveness. They don’t deserve it." And I always say the same thing, "You can only give forgiveness if they don’t deserve it." If they deserve it, you’re the one that’s wrong. If they deserve it, you’re the one that’s being unfair." The fact is you only give forgiveness if someone doesn’t deserve it and you’re basically saying, "I release this from myself and I release you from that." And the fact is you help yourself as much, if not more, than you help them when you do it.
So look: gratitude, confidence, forgiveness--these are simple choices that we can make every single day, so let’s make them.